Words of "Advice"

[Cookie Kat]

Recently, I've had time to reflect on my life. In doing so, I've come to a bunch of "revelations." Personally, I have a desire to solve people's problems. In general, I want to fix all the problems in the world. Of course, this in unrealistic, but my brain didn't care and I would still beat myself up about it. I've come to realize that I can't keep beating myself up every time I can't fix the problems in the world or people's problems. It isn't my job to even fix people's problems, I can give people advice but it's THEIR job to fix the problem.
Another thing is that I don't always have to be giving people advice, sometimes people just want another person to listen to them. I think especially online lots of people don't feel comfortable talking to people in real life, because of many factors. However, what stood out to me the most was facial expressions and body language. You can tell if someone is giving you pity by their facial expressions. Honestly, I'm terrible at reading body language and I thrive off of people's words, this is partially due to my Autism as many individuals who are autistic have trouble reading body language and social cues.
The last important piece I came up with, is my friends. Honestly, I wouldn't have made it this far without my friends. I realize that they have been super supportive, both my friends online and in real life. It was silly of me to think this- but a lot of the time I lock my emotions up because part of me believes that they can just read my mind. Sure, in real life they can read my facial expression and I'm pretty much terrible at hiding how I truly feel when it comes to body language/facial expression. However, the thing is... people can't read my mind, I have to be open with them, and that's when I knew that I have people in my life who want to help I just don't let them in.
To wrap things up, I want to say I'm incredibly thankful for the many people who have helped me along the way. Going forward I'm trying to be more honest with how I'm feeling and listening to people instead of trying to always give advice. (I found that I got burnt out quickly when I tried and failed to give good advice)

 

[Mushey]

I think we all can take something from your post. And that is that not every person is perfect and that is absolutely fine. I myself have made many slip ups in the past that I deeply regret and still bother me to do this day. But dwelling on bad isn't a good way to live life, and in many cases can lead to worse outcomes in the future. Yea you had a bad day, but there is ALWAYS and I mean ALWAYS a tomorrow. The mistakes aren't what define you but rather the deeds and good doing that have impacted others in doing good as well is how you will be remembered by. Ignorance is bliss, it's the bliss that you will be remembered by and not the ignorance that so many of us link ourselves with. Now I ain't no Martin Luther King, but a general rule of thumb for any person no matter who you are is, take care of yourself before you take care of others. We all at some point want the best for people and do anything in our power to see them succeed. However that comes with sacrificing our own well-being and that isn't healthy. Your own mental health is just as important as any other. Especially in a time like this. All of us should be our #1 supporters.

 

[Cookie Kat]

I think we all can take something from your post. And that is that not every person is perfect and that is absolutely fine. I myself have made many slip ups in the past that I deeply regret and still bother me to do this day. But dwelling on bad isn't a good way to live life, and in many cases can lead to worse outcomes in the future. Yea you had a bad day, but there is ALWAYS and I mean ALWAYS a tomorrow. The mistakes aren't what define you but rather the deeds and good doing that have impacted others in doing good as well is how you will be remembered by. Ignorance is bliss, it's the bliss that you will be remembered by and not the ignorance that so many of us link ourselves with. Now I ain't no Martin Luther King, but a general rule of thumb for any person no matter who you are is, take care of yourself before you take care of others. We all at some point want the best for people and do anything in our power to see them succeed. However that comes with sacrificing our own well-being and that isn't healthy. Your own mental health is just as important as any other. Especially in a time like this. All of us should be our #1 supporters.

Yes, I totally agree with what you're saying. I still think that it's easier all "said than done." I decided if there is a meaning to life, it would be to love other people. However, I feel like I have failed at this because I don't love everyone, I feel if we're going to love others we have to love even the people who hurt us. I believe this is probably one of the most confusing concepts about love... though love is very confusing, and I guess it is kinda complex.
My point is, I feel that my mission (and maybe others agree) is to love, and to forgive others who have done me wrong. Still, it feels like nothing some do or say can heal the wounds deep inside of me. And yeah, I told other people in this community how I felt, but that didn't really help either. I guess that I just have to wait and see, and maybe one day I can get over what happened in the past. Because it's not fun to hold onto the bitterness I carry around inside. The bitterness and resentment I carry is what made me want to leave the community so many times. Not just because I did people wrong and thought I didn't deserve to be here, but because other people did me wrong and I was mad at them and didn't want to have to deal with them. It felt it didn't matter what game mode I was on, it was like those people were always there. And it truly bothered me, more than I'd like to admit.
But in thinking all this, I realized that maybe love isn't something that has to be unconditional, and did those people actually mean to hurt you? People do stupid things when they are angry or upset, they lash out at people do all kinds of crap. Does it make them bad people? No... you said we aren't defined by our mistakes, so they clearly are just like you and I, because deep down we're all hurting. I was in denial, thought I wasn't hurting but the truth is we're all on fire.
Maybe it isn't OUR jobs to right their wrong, and lead them towards the light, but hating on them and putting them down isn't going to help either. That's where I've gone wrong... because so many times I would go to my friends and talk crap about all the people I didn't like. Of course my friends would say "oh those people are just frigging ***" (I'm not going to say who said what for anonymity). Still, that just doesn't seem right either. See, at the end of the day these people who do us wrong are our brothers and sisters. Call me religious, but I think someway we're all connected. In a way that no human mind could ever comprehend. I believe the best thing we can do is be our best selves, and hopefully others will be influenced by our actions and in turn try to be their best selves. Be patient, be kind, be loving, and accept that WE AREN'T PERFECT!